Thursday, June 3, 2010

12 Suggestions to Keep Your Marriage Alive and Well

1. Do not compare your mate or your marriage to others. There is not another person on earth like you. Your mate is also unique . This means that your marriage is unique. Let God make it what He wants it to be. He will make it perfect!

2. Be quick to forgive one another. You are to forgive as Christ has forgiven you. You are a sinner. He or she is a sinner. Neither of you are perfect--so be willing to forgive one another. And do it right away before any bitterness can build up.

3. Stop all criticism. Love does not criticize and find fault. Therefore, if you are critical of your mate, you do not have a heart of love. Stop all criticism. Instead, try a little praise. It works like magic!

4. Start communicating with your mate. Communication is completely broken down in many homes and marriages. Start listening to what your mate is saying as well as to what he or she is not saying. Brake down the barriers by being vulnerable. A note to the men... if you want to get to the heart of a woman, try the "3 Ts." Women want Time, Talk, and Touch. In fact, most significant relationships involve these three essential ingredients. Time is the first priority. Without it, the other two aren't possible. Talk is the preeminent intercourse that  makes the other kind even more glorious. And genuine, non-sexual Touch is a critical component that has been lost in a sea of immorality and selfish pursuits. And ladies... Be quick with compliments and words that support and affirm your man. Let him know that you'd marry him all over again. Tell him how much you appreciate his hard work as a provider.

5. Refuse any relationship outside your marriage in which affection is sought or given. This substitute could even be a relative, a friend, or a neighbor. Do not seek to make someone else a substitute for what you are not getting in your marriage. You will never solve your problem doing this.

6. Maintain a healthy sense of humor. This can be some of the best medicine you can take. Laugh with each other frequently. It will bring you closer and keep you young!

7. Keep your faith alive. Worship and pray together. Make it a priority. The closer husbands and wives walk with Christ the easier their lives together will become.

8. Trust your mate. Trust your spouse, even if he or she is wrong--you are right in trusting. A marriage must be based on trust. It cannot survive without it.

9. Find special ways to bless your mate--these don't have to be big things, but something that you know will bring your partner joy and happiness. A note, a card, an unexpected phone call... This is not asking much--but it pays big dividends. 

10. Thank God every day for the 10 best qualities in your mate. Write them down. Concentrate on them and the positive will soon outshine the negative.

11. Don't ever stop dating. Keep your marriage fresh by not letting staleness set in. Make time for the "want to's" and have fun together. Remember that before you were married you were boyfriend & girlfriend.

12. Never consider divorce an option. It is not a solution to your problem. Divorce is not an acceptable alternative because God says it is not. When things are not running as smoothly as you like, begin to apply the suggestions listed above.

*This was an outline my husband and I received at our small (young married couples) group, at church. I thought it was great and really wanted to share it with you all. My personal favorite is #10. I LOVE focusing on the positive, rather than the negative--it makes life so much more enjoyable that way!*

With LOVE,

2 loving comments:

gianna said...

I love this list. I might need to print this one off. And I have something for you on my blog.

Rae said...

These are all very good tips!

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